Childhood Bullying - How to Provide Support

Bullying can have a profound impact on a child’s mental well being. As a caregiver, it can be very difficult to know how to support your child through this challenging situation. Knowing how to help can make all the difference in your child’s ability to recover and thrive. Here are some practical ways to support a child who is being bullied.

Create a safe space to talk

The first step in addressing bullying is to make sure your child feels safe to share their feelings and experiences. Encourage open communication by:

• Asking open-ended questions such as: “Can you tell me more about what happened today?”
• Validate their feelings with responses like: "That sounds really hard. I’m proud of you for how you handled it, and I'm glad you told me.”
• Offer support: "Let's work together to find a way to make things better."

Reassure them that it is not their fault

It can be really hard for children to understand why they are being bullied. You can explain that bullying behaviour is never ok, and seeking support from peers and safe adults is a good idea. It can be helpful to point out that we can only control our own behaviour and responses, and we can't control the behaviour of others. We can however, influence the outcome of a situation based on how we react. For example, teaching your child how to regulate their emotions and remain calm and assertive when interacting with a bully can help diffuse the situation, especially if the bully is looking to get an emotional reaction.

Work with the school

Most schools have rigorous anti-bullying policies in place. Reaching out to teachers, counsellors, or administrators to inform them of the situation and collaborate on a plan to ensure your child’s safety is an excellent way to support your child. Be persistent in following up to ensure measures are being implemented effectively.

Encourage healthy coping mechanisms

Children who are being bullied may experience a range of emotions including anger, sadness, anxiety, etc. Teach them healthy ways to cope such as:

• Journaling about their feelings
• Practicing relaxation techniques like deep breathing or mindfulness
• Teaching strategies to use in the moment such as: Ignoring the bully, surrounding themselves with healthy peer relationships, remaining calm and assertive, seeking support, reporting bullying behaviour to a safe adult
• Helping them engage in activities that promote confidence and self-esteem
• Talking with a trusted adult or therapist

Addressing online bullying

Cyberbullying can be especially harmful, as it can feel inescapable. To support a child who is experiencing online bullying, you can use all of the tips from above, as well as these online specific tips:

• Engage in regular discussions with your child/youth about how to be safe and responsible online, how to spot unsafe or inappropriate behaviour, and what to do if they feel uncomfortable or unsafe
  • Save evidence: Teach your child to take screenshots or save messages as evidence to report the behaviour.
  • Adjust privacy settings: Set up age appropriate parental controls and privacy settings on their social media accounts and block/report individuals who are bullying them.
  • Set boundaries: Placing time limits on screen time and usage helps promote balance and gives youth time to disconnect- literally. Other boundaries to consider would be when and where youth can use devices at home (eg. devices are handed in at bed time, devices must be used in shared spaces and not alone in their room, parents/caregivers have the right to go through devices, apps, messages, etc.
  • Involve authorities when needed: If the bullying includes threats, harassment, or violations of platform policies, report it to the platform and contact the other child's parents, the school, or even law enforcement if necessary.

Bullying is a challenging experience, but with the right support, children can emerge even stronger and more resilient. By listening, empowering and advocating for your child, you help lay the foundation for their recovery and future success. Bullying can be hard not only on the child, but on caregivers as well. Resources are available if you or your child need help navigating this experience.

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